Minimalism.Independence.Feminism.Fearless.Learning.Positivity.Down to Earth
How the parents treat us greatly determines our behavior .So as a parent we have to be careful what we are saying to our child as it can shape his/her future.That ‘s why it is a huge responsibility to be a parent.However it does not mean that we should get scared by thinking about it but we should try our best.I am not a parent untill now but I was a child and I used to think about a lot of things and kind of remember some of them.
Here I am telling you about some of the life lessons I got from my father.
Lesson No.1 Minimalist Living
Apart from the basic life expenses ,he has always taught us to live with the minimum necessary things in life to be happy.He could have a better job as he is highly educated with two master degrees but he was satisfied with his minimalist teaching job.The reason according to him was as we grow our salaries, our headache increases and our expenses .And again we are left with only that much saving which we were doing before with less headache and less working hours.
When I was in my school ,I demanded a bike to go for tutions he has always tried that we should go by walk or by bicycle.As these are good for our health and for our environment.Moreover they are not costing anything.If we buy a bike ,then we will have to start exercising in gym which will cost more.Rather then investing in liabilities we should invest in making assets.Although these terms can be too much for you if you have never read about managing finances.Let me know if you want to know more about managing finances.
Lesson No.2 Learning Independence
Although these economic lessons can be expected from him as he is an economy teacher.But there is a lot more to know.Whenever I used to come to home from my hostel ,I always ask him to pick me up and he has always encouraged to come by my own .He used to say “take a riksha beta”. You know these little things has made me an independent women who is not dependent to reach home.
As I am raised like that when I was in USA , I was not feeling good and my husband was busy with work,I would take a cab and visit wherever I want to.A lot of times I used to go to a mall by myself just to enjoy the day and yes alone..It happens that we women are more into shopping than men and it is ok to go by yourself.
No doubt I used to complain for these things at that time but now I have understand its importance .It is very important to give the ladies in your family freedom to do their things by themselves and to have the trust that they can do anything.
Lesson No. 3 Believing in Feminism
As you all know documentation in India is the most difficult thing to get done. And these processes are not improving but are becoming difficult with days.I remember how the days were easy in US ,there was a single id called “SSN” with which you can do anything you want in that country.
So whenever there were any changes need to be made into id proofs ,my father never went alone and do all of the documentation work by himself .He used to bring me with him and helped me know how the things are done. And after that I have myself went to many government organizations in my hometown to have the changes made in my id proofs and sometimes in gurgaon also .In reality I used to get frustated a lot that time. But now I know how to do things by myself.
He has treated me like a child not like a girl. Being a believer of feminism ,it is the responsibility of the men in the family to raise such values among the newer generation. You see how small things greatly effect the behavior of the child.
Lesson No. 3 Being Fearless
There is one more instance I would like to tell about .We prefer to go mostly by walk everywhere.I was like dad I feel ashamed by walking. Everyone else is in their bikes or cars.I do not know that thinking was because of my age or what.He used to say that nobody is watching you ,everyone else is busy in his/her matters. I used to think about his sayings.And you know I have become a person for whom it does not matter what other person think about me .I can go anywhere by walk in my pj’s.That does not mean that I dont love fashion ,I like to wear good clothes but not because I want to impress others but for me .
Lesson No.4 Always Learning
He has inspired me to continue learning irrespective of the age. Being a teacher of economics he has continued his passion of music . He plays tabla very well and sing too. You will not believe that he has started taking lessons of drawing currently. He is learning how to draw the creatures perfectly.Whenever I saw him,I am inspired to learn new things.
And this attitude is not towards me only, he has encouraged my mother also to drive by herself and to do whatever she want to do in life.And his respect for my mother has great effects on me as I know what things to look for in my partner.
I have already told in my blogs how irrespective of working in IT field, how passionate I am towards art ranging from dance ,photography ,blogging ,decoration etc.
Lesson No.5 Positivity
Another thing I learned from my father is the art of positivity. To fight the negativity around you, you need some kind of positivity in yourself . Because anything can be achieved if you desire. And negative thoughts will do nothing helping . I know it is impossible to completely eliminate it but we can significantly reduce it on most of the days.
I believe that how just a smile on a person entering your way can create good aura around you.In this regard also ,I was irritated when my father used to tell these things but after I read the book “Secret” ,I kind of developed a belief in him . You know sometimes people say do not speak out about things that have not happened yet as they will not happen then.But the reality is opposite if you want to make something happen, believe it say it loud to the universe and regularly do actions in that direction.
My friends have told me manytimes that they have found a sense of positivity whenever I am nearby.And then you get to know that how much behavior affects the environment.
Lesson No.6 Down to Earth
When you meet someone ,it is said that in just 5 mins the other person get to know about you.It greatly matters how we talk and how we respond to things.I have always seen that my father’s nature never changes irrespective of the position of the person he is talking to.He is gentle to everybody.
I have always been greatly influenced by my father. That’s why I have always this perception in my mind about the things I would look for in my partner .I would not say that my husband is a copy of him .But these two personalities are very different although they have a pure heart and have always inspired me to grow in life. I will be always be thankful to both of them. But as a child, your parent’s behavior has great effects on you.
Read about my thoughtprocess on marriage in this article https://www.theexplorerdiary.com/2020getting-married-or-staying-single/(opens in a new tab)
